Who is useless? That's right- it's ME!
If I don't get a job soon I am going to empty the garbage underneath the bed and crawl under it and start digging a tunnel to China.
Being unemployed for this long is like walking around the neighborhood, leash in hand, with no dog attached at the end.
I try and stay busy as I can. I've started with the Somali family which definitely has its ups and downs. Currently I am extreeeeeemly frustrated (not with them). I can't teach unless there is a goal, unless I can explain what the fucking lesson is, and what I want them to do. If I can't tell them what I am trying to teach them I come off as a bumbling idiot and they get confused. And them getting confused makes them frustrated because they want to understand. What they need are formal classes. They need more than I can give, and that is why I am frustrated. Not to mention spending time in bookstores lately looking for educational books that don't have a bunch of chubby white people in there learning words associated with American culture that the Somalii's won't even come close to understanding yet until they know more about the country. What they need is fucking PBS yo but apparently something about TVs don't work anymore because you need a digital converter or some nonsense.
I didn't go to the Ironwood last Wednesday b/c of this lame ass mock disaster drill at the airport here. It could've been really awesome and a great learning experience but the public safety folks (firefighters, EMTs, police, hazmat, etc.) didn't take it seriously AT ALL and it was a waste of time and taxpayers money. It really ticked us students (who played the victims) off because we thought it was going to be a real scenario (which is was set up to be) but one fat lady cop came over to an unconscious guy (20 minutes after the incident) and said "Hey, so, like, are you supposed to be dead?" ...and he didn't respond (hello, he's unconscious!) and she says to her partner "Hey this one is dead so I guess that's less work for us." WHAT a JOKE! I sort of wanted to if that bitch knew anything about weapons retention or anything police oriented at all but I didn't want to get it trouble. Oh the satisfaction if I'd been able to take her sidearm out of her holster though.
Tangent: Police. I've never been intimidated by them. I don't know why that is. Maybe my parents didn't teach me a lot about fearing authority but I always used to argue with them which embarassed my mother but entertained my father. I remember we tried to bike into an air show in the early 90s and the cops wouldn't let us go past the fence. So then we started to lock our bikes to the fence and they told us we couldn't do that. So then we asked where we could and they didn't know. (Keep in mind this is at an airfield so the nearest trees, poles, etc. were pretty far away) so then I asked them what they would do (I was genuinely curious) if we went ahead and rode our bikes in anyway, past them. It wasn't all obnoxious "oh yeah well what are you going to do about it?" at least not in my mind. I just wanted to know. I just never understood why people revere/fear cops so much. ANYWAY, they told us they would catch us. This is what makes the whole thing memorable to my kid brain. I was thinking how were they going to catch us if we were on bicycles and they were on foot. They must have seen the thought because they pointed behind them to a nearby hanger and there were 2 police bicycles there leaned against the siding. I thought it was so funny I started having one of those hysterical freakish kid laughing attacks. The police did not find it funny. My Dad, at this point, is making one of his jokes no one gets "Ohhhh, OK, so that's where the bikes are kept. Well, c'mon kid let's roll over there and put the bikes away." At some point in the course of this, they informed us that they were going to have to escort us out and not allow us to watch the Air Show. This has stuck with me. I was 8 years old. ReaLLy?
Anyway, I hate seeing lazy cops. Nothing makes me angrier than a cop who lacks self respect and integrity. Last night, at Barrio Viejo festival I noticed a pair, the woman was fit and observant, the man was AT LEAST 100 lb's overweight/obese. Sorry but if you're plan for apprehension is "to sit on a fool" you must realize you have to in fact catch that fool first. I was at the Festival alone so I was in my entertain myself mode which involves a lot of people watching. For a while last night it was cop watching. It was comical. Hey, here is a recipe for a real disaster, a large number of people and a fat cop with his hands on his hips oblivious to anything but watching small children eating ice cream cones. My entertainment came in the form of as walking past the cops, pointing out to Fatty that his keepers were unsnapped and when he looked down I said "HA! Made you look!" It was priceless. I didn't stick around for the negative reaction to come across his face, just long enough for that initial dumbfounded look.
Tangent over. _ _ _ _ _
I did go on a really enjoyable hike last Sunday up to some waterfalls. I packed a picnic lunch to eat when I got there. I offered a cutie named Ethan one of my carrots but he declined. Who hikes that far and declines a carrot is what I want to know?! Anyway, he went on top of the falls and I took a couple pictures of him and told him I would email him. He sort of implied it'd be cool if I hiked back down with him but I was like no thanks which I think he took to mean no thanks not with you. Which is unfortunate because really I just don't like hiking with strangers all that much AND I was waiting to be the last one to leave for 2 reasons: I wanted to sing on the way down, and I wanted it to be in the sunset. I got my wish and it was SOOOO worth it. I saw this hawk riding a thermal and he was just suspended motionless at one point not moving forward or backward, up or down, just about the mountain line. It was so cool looking. The saguaros and cacti are mostly washed out with an abundance of sunlight during the day but at sunset color bursts through the plants like a glow, and it's beautiful. The wildlife comes out...coyotes, javelinas, birds, bats, deer.
What can one say when one's boyfriend starts dating another woman. Oh fuck. There I go calling him my boyfriend again. I swear! Could I make it all go away by undergoing hypnosis?
Today I hiked up Picacho Peak yo and it was super fun. Lots of cables and weird positioning to get up there. OH YEAH and what the hell is up with people declining a carrot?! This is the second time it's happened. Am I the only one that finds carrots extremely comforting on a hike?!
I have been texting this guy Zach, trying to figure out if I like him or not. It's hard to tell. I think I should take a risk and invest myself a little..possibly next weekend? I thought he might come meet me at the Barrio last night but he had just rode his bike 50 miles (that's right) up Mt. Lemmon b/c he is training for an upcoming trip. Apparently today he ran this crazy race. He exhausts me just hearing about it.
I have a huge test on Tuesday. Tomorrow is Monday. Guess that means I should start studying?! ;)
Today's photo on top of Picacho Pk
